


happy new year

by TheDeviantSentByJericho



Series: Another Human AU [1]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Always, And also vitiligo but it isn't mentioned here, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Needs a Hug, Caretaker Deceit | Janus Sanders, Deceit | Janus Sanders Has Heterochromia, Deceit | Janus Sanders is a Good Friend, Flashbacks, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Multi, Ne was, Nonbinary Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Other, Patton | Morality Sanders Mentioned, Post Happy Ending ig?, Suicidal Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Sympathetic Deceit | Janus Sanders, Sympathetic Morality | Patton Sanders, Sympathetic Sides (Sanders Sides), and he gets one, ig, or at least, ventfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:00:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28486494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDeviantSentByJericho/pseuds/TheDeviantSentByJericho
Summary: just before the clock strikes midnight, virgil has a flashback. janus helps.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders
Series: Another Human AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2086641
Comments: 4
Kudos: 24





	happy new year

**Author's Note:**

> edit: LMAO I ACCIDENTALLY BOLDED THE ENTIRE CHAPTER I'M SO SORRY GUYS IT'S FIXED NOW

They were all curled up together on the couch of their apartment. Janus and Remus had come over to stay the night, to celebrate with them, because their apartment was a lot smaller than the one Virgil, Patton, Roman, and Logan all shared. Deciding to play more chill this year, they were just leaning against each other and watching an old episode of Doctor Who. It was one of Virgil's comfort shows, but ne'd forgotten what happened in this particular episode.

Which was why ne was so unprepared when it happened.

A line of people, all stepping up to the edge.

The camera leaned in, looked down.

Cars and people moved so far below.

Terror shot through Virgil. No, not terror, terror didn't even _begin_ to explain the feelings that were rising inside of nem. The feet on the edge were nirs, the landscape shifting, body trembling, ne _felt it all_.

It was only a moment, but a moment was enough. Virgil bolted upright, stiff, walked as fast as ne could out of the room. Alone, ne collapsed on a beanbag and curled up around nemself. 

_it hurt, it hurt, it hurt, scared scared scared, ne was so **scared**_ it wasn't fair, ne did it to nemself, it was bad, ne did bad, ne was bad, bad bad bad bad hurt hurt hurt hurt bad bad bad scared scared **scared**

"Virgil, breathe. Breathe, honey. Good job, Virgil, breathe in, you're doing great, hold it, I'm so proud of you..." 

The voice was calm, gentle, reassuring. Kind. Virgil did nir best to follow its instructions. 

"remember,,," ne muttered softly, reaching out to grasp at the owner of the voice. it let nem, held nem close, just loose enough so ne could escape if ne felt ne needed to. "didn't wanna remember. wasn't ready," 

"Just breathe, little shadow, just breathe. I've got you. You're safe now." 

"i didn't know it was coming i didn't i'm sorry i'm sorry sorry sorry sorry-" 

"No need to apologize, shadowling. It's not your fault." 

"But it _is_! My fault, my fault, I hurt me, I hurt _him!_ " Virgil finally had to courage to open nir eyes. Janus stared back at nem, odd-coloured eyes kind. 

"Wouldn't it be better to work through what to do next than to focus on blaming ourselves for what we did in the past?" 

"I- I guess- but I still hurt him!" 

"You clearly didn't mean to and wish you hadn't. Does Patton blame you at all?" 

"Not that I'm aware... but he should." 

Janus wrapped his hands around Virgil's. "Don't you think that's for him to decide?" he said softly.  
Virgil glanced away and didn't answer. 

Janus sighed. "Does it still hurt him, what happened? Or is it just you that is being tortured by the memory?" 

Closing nir eyes again, Virgil leaned away, holding nir arms to nir chest. "He... He gets nightmares sometimes. Doesn't want to tell me about them, but I got him to talk to me. And he talked to Logan, and he told me the bits he wouldn't. The what-ifs,,, bad." Virgil wasn't sure how to explain, but Janus seemed to understand. 

"It is worth remembering that there were things that might've happened, but they didn't. And you don't particularly intend to put yourself in the situation again, I'd imagine?" 

"I don't intend to but sometimes it's hard." Curling in on nemself, Virgil sighed, opening nir eyes slightly. "I don't think so." 

"I understand." Janus reached out, offering. Immediately, Virgil delved into the safety of his arms. "He doesn't blame you, none of us blame you, and if it happens again, we're here for you, you know that? We're here to help. 

"I-" Virgil looked up. "Yeah. Thank you." 

"Of course." They shared a weak smile. "Do you think you want to come back? To the movie, I mean." Janus asked. 

V hesitated. "Yes? Maybe? What time is it? 

Janus pulled out his phone and laughed, flipping it around to show Virgil the number. **11:59** , ticked upwards as ne watched. 

"Happy New Year, Virgil." 

_"Happy New Year."_


End file.
